


Shizune and Misha's Unforgettable Luncheon

by coolcat001100



Category: Katawa Shoujo, The Simpsons
Genre: Steamed Hams
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-05
Updated: 2018-10-05
Packaged: 2019-07-25 15:19:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16200227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coolcat001100/pseuds/coolcat001100
Summary: On a holiday weekend seemingly like any other, Hisao decides to take up Shizune and Misha on their offer to have him over for lunch. Little does he expect that the afternoon is fated to be one filled with unexpected twists, mental games of cat-and-mouse, and northern lights. Can't forget the northern lights.





	Shizune and Misha's Unforgettable Luncheon

**Author's Note:**

> I originally wrote this several months ago back when the meme was still popular, and just shared it with my close friends. I meant to get around to actually posting this a lot sooner, but after I finished uploading my fics from Deviantart on here, college work and personal issues caused me to get really lazy and not upload anything of my other fics here like I first said I would.  
> Thankfully, I finally got the lead out of my system and have officially put it here. When I start uploading more fics (and hopefully it will be a lot sooner), expect them to be more random one-shots about various things I'm into; don't expect much consistency from me here.  
> Oh yeah, and of course, I hope you enjoy!

It was a fairly slow day in the city as Hisao walked up to Shizune's house. Though the city was always a bit of a noisy place, the difference could certainly be felt to anyone who had been to the area before. There seemed to be less traffic, the sounds of walking and talking weren't as loud, and if one kept their ears tuned just right, they could even make out the sound of a few birds chirping. This was to be expected - the students of Yamaku had the week off for a holiday, and it was currently the weekend, so it was to be expected that this would be around the time that many people would be leaving their homes to head to whatever R&R getaway they had in mind for the occasion.

Hisao, however, had no such plans, save for the afternoon he had decided to spend with Shizune and Misha after they'd invited him over the day before. He had come to feel a lot less apprehensive about the idea than he once would've - now that he was legitimately part of the Student Council, he wouldn't have to worry about them trying to bribe him or otherwise make it all about their offer. This would just be a nice, fun get-together between friends.

He rung the doorbell to Shizune's house once he'd made it to the front door. Barely a few seconds passed before Misha opened it, Shizune standing right beside her. "Hello Misha, Shizune," Hisao said, promptly beginning to sign along with his words, "I finally made it. Gotta say, though, I pity the next person you give directions to."

Misha gave him a grin that stretched ear-to-ear, neither her nor Shizune paying his feedback much mind. "Ah, Hicchan! Welcome~! I hope you're ready for one yummy delicious super terrific meal!"

Hisao nodded in agreement, stepping inside as they all walked into the dining room. While he chose his seat at the table, placing the cans of soda he brought in the middle, the two girls went into the kitchen area to check on their meal.

Unfortunately, neither of them had anticipated the sight that revealed such a catastrophic cuisine.

The girls both tensed up in fright as soon as they saw the first puffs of smoke leaving the oven, billowing out in such large quantities that it was a wonder it didn't set off the smoke alarm. They quickly rushed over, Misha covering her face from the smoke as she opened the oven to take a look.

As expected, the pot roast was entirely ablaze. Though a few lucky parts in the middle were still untouched, the most of it had turned black as charcoal. No way would anyone eat it by this point.

"Oh, no no no!" Misha exclaimed, closing the oven door. "Our roast is ruined!"

Shizune quickly consorted her cranium. The pantry still had some good stuff in it, but nothing that would constitute the kind of complete meal they'd promised to serve. They couldn't just bring out some canned food or leftovers when they had company over. If their classmate Hanako was here, she could've possibly given some cooking advice... but then again, by this point it probably would've been too late for that.

Just as all hope seemed lost, her gaze caught something outside the window. Misha noticed and followed her eyesight. Out the window, plain as day, was the large sign for the local Big Kahuna Burger, only a few blocks away.

"[What if...]" Shizune signed as she grabbed Misha's attention, "[You were to purchase fast food and we disguised it as our own cooking?]"

Misha grinned and then laughed as soon as she caught on to what Shizune was thinking. "[Delightfully devilish as always, Shicchan!]"

With that, Misha promptly opened the window and began to climb out of it... only stopping when Hisao suddenly walked in.

Everyone stopped at once as Hisao took in the odd sight before him. The oven that the girls had been using to cook was blowing more smoke than the engine of a steam train, and one of the girls had opened up the window not to let it out, but was currently halfway outside of it. Not exactly the sight he'd been expecting to see today.

"Am I... interrupting something?" he asked.

"Hicchan! I was just, um," Misha scrambled for words, "Stretching my calves on the windowsill! It's good for your quads and pecs and all that stuff! Wanna join us?~"

"...Why is there smoke coming out of your oven?" he asked.

"Uh," Misha's eyes darted between the oven and Hisao. "Oh! That isn't smoke! It's, uh-"

"[Steam,]" Shizune interjected. "[Steam from the steamed clams we'll be having.]" She rubbed her belly and licked her lips to punctuate her point.

Hisao's eyes narrowed for a second before he decided to just roll with it, and exited the room.

Misha wiped a bead of sweat off her forehead and exhaled, glad that they averted the situation in the nick of time. Shizune motioned for her to go, and she quickly lept out the window, making a beeline for the Big Kahuna Burger.

...

Just as Hisao started wondering if he should check to see what the girls were really up to, they finally came into the dining room, Misha brandishing a large, fancy tray of hamburgers with a set of french fries neatly decorating it.

"Hicchan," Misha began her cheshire smile as wide as ever, "I hope you're ready for some scrumpdiddlyumptious hamburgers!"

As he finished tucking his napkin into his sweater-vest, Hisao shot her a quizzical look. "I thought you said we were having steamed clams?"

Misha laughed as she set down the tray, freeing up her hands to sign along with her speech. "Wahahaha! No, no, silly~! You must've misread Shicchan! She said steamed _hams!_ That's what she calls hamburgers!"

Hisao turned his gaze towards Shizune. "You call hamburgers 'steamed hams'?"

Shizune smiled and nodded. "[Yes. It's an American expression. They're the part of the world known for their hamburgers, after all.]"

Hisao cocked his eyebrow. "Uh-huh... what part of America?"

Shizune paused for a moment before answering. "[Central Maryland.]"

"Really..." Hisao said, his eyes narrowing. "Well, I went to Washington D.C. once, and I never heard anyone use the phrase 'steamed hams' while I was there."

"[Oh no, not D.C.,]" the blue-haired girl responded, "[It's a Bel Air expression.]"

"Ah, I see."

The three friends proceeded to eat in silence, taking some time to just enjoy each other's presence and let the silence set in. Deep into their feast, however, Hisao looked at the patty underneath his bun and placed his food down before signing. "You know, these hamburgers look pretty similar to the ones they serve down at Big Kahuna."

The pink-haired girl immediately laughed, though it sounded a pitch higher than usual. "Wahahaha! No~! These are patented Hakamichi burgers! They're Shicchan's old family recipie!"

Hisao turned to Shizune once again. "...Your family has a recipe for steamed hams."

Shizune nodded. "[Yes.]"

"Yes, and you call them steamed despite the fact that they are obviously grilled."

Her face fell swiftly. She and Misha looked to each other before looking back at Hisao, neither daring to speak first. Shizune brought up her hands a couple times to start signing something, only to give up partway through. After a few awkward moments she stood up from her chair, motioning for Misha to follow her.

"Excuse us for a sec, Hicchan," Misha said as she stood up.

"Certainly," Hisao replied.

They both went back into the kitchen as Hisao resumed eating alone. However, after what only seemed like barely a couple seconds, they entered the dining room again, Misha stretching and giving a big yawn.

"Ahh~, that was super fun! I think Shicchan and I had better get to some Student Council work, though."

Hisao wiped his mouth and began to stand up. "Yeah, I should probably-"

His sentence was cut off by the sight of a giant red glow emanating from the doorway to the kitchen, bright enough to illuminate the backs of the two girls in front of him.

"Good lord! What is happening in there?!" he exclaimed, pointing to the doorway.

"Uh-" the pink-haired girl stuttered before the bespectacled one quickly cut her off. "[Aurora Borealis.]"

Hisao looked at her incredulously, slowly turning to Misha before responding. "...Did she just say Aurora Borealis?!"

Misha awkwardly played with her hair before giving Hisao a nervous smile. "Yes?"

His jaw dropped further before talking again. "At this time of year, at this time of day, in this part of the world, localized _entirely_ within your kitchen?!"

Shizune confidently nodded, giving him a smile. "Mm-hm."

Hisao's gaze dropped to the floor as he pondered their words. The girls felt every muscle in their body go still, waiting for him to eventually respond.

Finally he did, looking back up at them again. "May I see it?"

Shizune looked to Misha for a moment before turning back to Hisao, shaking her head. "Mm-mm."

...

A bit later they stepped outside the house just as they heard Jigoro begin to shout from upstairs. "Hey! The house is on fire!"

"No, Shicchan's dad!" Misha yelled back, "That's just the northern lights!"

Facing them again, Hisao crossed his arms behind his back. "Well, girls, you're both pretty odd, but I must say..."

He gave them a smile, "You steam a good ham."

With that he walked off, the girls grinning and giving him a thumbs-up as Jigoro's screams for help fell upon deaf ears.


End file.
